Global POV: At the Intersection of Technology and Culture

Bush's Post-presidency Plans

by David Holtzman

President Bush this week, in a rare candid interview with NPR discussed some of his post-presidential plans. Mr. Bush appeared weary as he talked about world travel that he wanted to do that he'd never had time for: "I want to go all over, you know, El Paso, Amarillo, maybe even Galveston."

The greying President showed interest at the suggestion that he could be an owner of another Baseball team. "This time, maybe Manager. Who knows, you know...what about shortstop?"

He laughed. "Actually I was planning on enrolling in the London School of Economics and get my doctorate in a subject that's long interested me, the economic significance of demand-centric markets in newly created democracies." He laughed and asked me to pull his finger.

When asked about the topic that usually consumes most presidents, history, Mr. Bush showed that he was no exception. "I want to be remembered most for my sweet, sweet Iraqi War. And the economy. Oh yeah, how about the new spirit of bipartisan cooperation that I introduced?" We paused while the President laughed hard enough that he began to choke.

The current-but-soon-mercifully-gone President expressed happiness at his greatest accomplishment. "You all never got the dirt on me. My little thingie with the interns. My love child with Condie. Hell, you guys don't even know about my drinkin'" [The President popped open his third beer during the course of the interview]. Hey, you want to snort a coupla lines?"

Vice President Cheney, who had been listening quietly in the room during the interview, declined to answer similar questions as he expressed growing disgust at Bush's answers. When asked directly about his plans after next January, the Veep simply growled, "I thought that I'd f**k your mother, so the next time you kiss her, you get syphilis."

April 1st, right?

Here's a really good one:

Posted on April 01, 2008

Three monkeys for president

by David Holtzman

What is experience when it comes to political leadership? This question is shaping up to be a key one for the 2008 Presidential election. Senator Clinton claims that she is far more experienced than Senator Obama, because she served as First Lady for eight years. Her White House schedule was just made public this week and it's not clear that her background is as straightforward as she claims. Much of what she did was social, other than her botched attempt to reform the Health Care system.

Obama doesn't have that much experience. But he's not really claiming that he has.

McCain has a lot of experience. If that was truly the qualifying criteria, then he'd be the man. He might be genuinely crazy, however and that's a little scary.

So how important is experience in a Presidential campaign? George Bush Jr was woefully unqualified to be President. Other than a stint as governor of Texas (which is like being the head inmate in the asylum that gets control of the tv remote during recreation time), his leadership background was primarily running a baseball team.

Perhaps we'd be better off with a young president who reinvents the office. That's points for Obama. The Clinton people will argue that you need an experienced hand at the helm who knows who to get bills passed and can better control their agenda with Congress. Clinton didn't do that well at that endeavor before, but perhaps she'd be better now with her Senatorial experience under her belt.

Of course, Clinton detractors will say that Hillary has essentially been running on Bill's coattails her entire political career.

So what kind of experience do we want in our next leader? IMHO, things haven't been working so far. I go for someone new and for that reason I like Obama. I really wish one of the three of them had some credibility towards strengthening the economy and I'm afraid that none of them do.

Posted on March 21, 2008

New sex--New York, New Jersey

by David Holtzman

In the last few weeks, we've had to deal with the not-so-shocking revelations that Eliot Spitzer, the crusading governor of New York, spent more last year on prostitutes than I did on college tuition for my kids. Then after Spitzer resigns, the new governor Paterson admits to multiple affairs (after he was sworn in, of course). Plus we have former New Jersey Governor McGreevey's divorce trial in which his chauffeur has now testified that he had a menage-a-trois with the governor and his wife for years.

The big question is has this always been going on and the media just didn't report it or is this a recent trend? Or I guess it could be that computers and electronics being what they are these days, maybe it's just easier to catch someone? Politicians are getting savvy on the idea that anything can be ferreted out, which is maybe why Paterson just admitted it.

Posted on March 19, 2008

Client 9 from Outer Space

by David Holtzman

The news this week is heavily slanted towards the resignation of New York governor Eliot Spitzer, who was caught in a hookergate. Spitzer is an easy target, since his years of billing himself as a self-righteous prosecuting crusader virtually guarantee that when he crashes, he does so in the big, explosive way of the caught-out hypocrite.

Mr. Spitzer was caught dallying with a 22 year old hooker whom he imported from New York to DC to canoodle with him in the Mayfair Hotel, scene of much political canoodling. He was caught because his bank, HSBC, filed a suspicious activity report to the Treasury Department related to wire transfers that the former governor made to shell companies acting as bookers for the hookers. Once the government became interested in the unusual transactions, the FBI used wiretaps and surveillance of "Client 9" (as he was known) including monitoring his electronic transmissions such as text messaging to figure out what Spitzer was "up" to. They quickly discovered the he had been paying the escort service thousands of dollars through wire transfers to fund his ho-habit.

Wouldn't you think that of all people, Eliot Spitzer would have known better about the kind of trail that electronic fund transfers can leave? After a decade of electronically-fueled political scandals, not least of which being the infamous Clinton-Lewinsky embarrassment, he should known not to leave the record.

For future reference, if anyone famous out there is reading this and planning on screwing around:

1. Use a pay-as-you-go cellphone from 7-11
   
2. Transfer money via credit card through reputable companies (or use cash or better yet Paypal)
   
3. Stay at an Embassy Suites or something. The Mayflower is so used to wiretapping , they probably have a special suite devoted to the FBI
   

I wonder if anyone, any more, will be able to get away with anything; given a sufficient level of scrutiny.

Posted on March 14, 2008

Obama

by David Holtzman

After a brief flurry of primary activity, our voting choices are now limited to John McCain as the Republican candidate and Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton as the Democrat. As a Virginian, I am anxiously waiting for tomorrow's primary, especially since Obama and Clinton are neck-and-neck at the moment.

Either Clinton or Obama seem like reasonable choices and hey, at least John McCain is not Bush.

Clinton is now generally viewed as the candidate of experience; Obama is seen as the candidate of change.

I sense that America is on the cusp of change and whoever wins this election might be the catalyst. Do we want a wheeler-dealer like Senator Clinton or an ideologue like Senator Obama? Who can beat McCain and for that matter, do we care?

After a lot of soul searching, I will vote for change. I will vote for Obama.

I would like to see what Obama could do and if he's a bad choice, it's only four years. I am less interested in Senator Obama because of his race, then I am in his enthusiasm and attitude. He could make a difference.

Posted on February 11, 2008

Internet failed to vote in New Hampshire

by David Holtzman

Cnet makes the interesting observation about the Iowa and New Hampshire primaries that they were won by handshakes, not by the Internet.

The absence of something is rarely news the way that anticipated events hit the front page, but it made me stop and think when I read this. I would argue that the Internet has played less of a role so far, then, say 2004.

Many people (including myself) thought that this would be the first election that was completely dominated by the Internet. I was wrong. So far, it's been old-fashioned politicking. Sure, the web was used, but was it significant? Has anyone cared what the bloggers have said this time? Even the high priest of internet politicking, Joe Trippi, seems to have failed in accomplishing what he was supposed to do for the Edwards campaign.

It will interesting to see if tech plays a bigger role in the general election.

Posted on January 10, 2008

"White" house no, "Christian" house maybe?

by David Holtzman

In the day before the New Hampshire primary, Obama and McCain (or Romney) are positioned to win. Only days after the Iowa caucuses, it's still too early to digest the meaning of the Clinton/Huckabee upset. Like everyone else, I've been getting into lots of political discussions about what this all means. Sooner or later the conversation gets around to an independent run by Bloomberg.

Surprisingly enough, the conversation quickly focuses on religion. I've had several people tell me that they think that Americans will vote for a woman, a black man or a Mormon, but not a Jew. I hope that this isn't true, but there has been a lot of cross-climbing by the candidates. Romney hastily reassures evangelicals that Mormons are Christians and Obama seems to make the point that he's a Christian about once per speech.

Several months after the House passed Resolution 847 which recognized the importance of Christianity and Christmas, the 'C' word still seems to come up a lot. Is the country ready for a Jew?

Posted on January 08, 2008

Hillarys got game

by David Holtzman

Hillary Clinton is still upset about mature themes in video games and has renewed her pledge to clamp down on the video game industry if she is elected.

Her initial reaction came about because of the infamous "Hot Coffee" easter egg sequence in Grand Theft Auto III.

She's tried to push a bill through before making it a crime to sell kids adult games. Her Family Entertainment Protection Act which failed two years ago would probably be the template.

Doesn't she have enough to worry about? Voluntary guidelines for labeling content is one thing, making any but the most abhorrent content a crime is another. I mean, has anyone actually watched a movie like Hostel or Saw? Or how about the violent content in TV shows. Hayden what's-her-name was autopsied alive in one episode of Heroes last year, for chrissakes.

Personally, I think that war is obscene.

Posted on December 24, 2007

Crossing the American public

by David Holtzman

The Bush administration was unusual for its anti-intellectualism and its deep seated hypocrisy and arrogance, wrapped up neatly in an evangelical package. Whenever things got tough, President Bush would invoke God in some way or if not the deity himself, his opinions ("These people are evil"). He's not the only politician to drape a religious toga around his shoulders and have a self-righteousness party, but he is the first President to openly identify himself with evangelicals and to invoke religion in any but the most cynically abbreviated way. I am not talking about privately held religious belief, which is to Bushism like the difference between marital sex and an orgy.

I had thought that like the baby in the bathwater, this religious crassness would drain away when the plug was finally pulled on the Bush administration, but alas it is not to be.

Religion has figured way too prominently already in the presidential campaigning where many of the candidates (at least the Republicans), instead of repudiating Bushism, are running around the Midwest, reassuring the lay deacons that they embrace it.

Huckabee is trying to persuade everyone that he speaks for all Baptists and s a ghostly cross appears in some of his television ads. McCain has been ducking the issue personally, but identifies with the values of evangelical voters. Mitt Romney is trying to convince everyone that Mormonism is just as hard-core evangelical as the loudest of the Baptists while downplaying the weirdness that lingers around the fringe of the Mormon Church. Giuliani is trying to fast talk his way out of his support for abortion rights and Fred Thompson is trying to calmly backdoor bullshit his way into the White House by hoping voters will confuse his southern accent with his religious beliefs. Ron Paul has some crazy opinions about giant ordained badgers baptizing the IRS or something equally odd.

On the Democratic side, John Edwards, who Lord knows has more of a reason to pray than his colleagues (his wife has cancer), is a Methodist but refuses to discuss much beyond that. Hillary Clinton is also has a Methodist but has been vocal about bringing religion out in the open in American public life. Obama is trying to convince everyone that he is not a closet Muslim.

Where is the candidate who will say "Religious beliefs are every American's right to hold. We are here to elect the leaders of a secular government, which no matter what their personal beliefs, will not now or ever factor into my or anyone who works for me's decision making."

The First Amendment says that "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof. Thomas Jefferson described it as " building a wall of separation between church and state". I am willing to donate a brick if anyone knows a good builder.

Posted on December 20, 2007

The Bizarro President learns how to Reid

by David Holtzman

The New York Times has a story today talking about the deep animosity, almost hatred between Harry Reid, the Senate Majority Leader and President Bush.

Mr. Reid seems to feel that the President is less than competent, not so bright and fundamentally dishonest. Mr. Bush has not publicly expressed negative feelings about Mr. Reid, "He so not so bad person", said the President, "I him like we be buddies, like Georgie and Condie. Go skinny-dipping in White House pool."

Mr. Reid has apparently harbored ill feelings about the President's decision five years ago to store nuclear waste at Yucca Mountain 100 miles north of Las Vegas, in Mr. Reid's home state of Nevada. In defense, the President said "Glowey bomb stuff fun, but Dick say is bad for George, bad to play with, slap Georgies hands and send green poo-poo away to bad men Democrat gambling town, before it hurt Georgie, me get oldtimers disease like Uncle Ronnie, make Georgie's meat stick fall off."

Mr. Reid has continually dueled with the President in the media, most recently over the President's expanded use of his veto powers. Mr. Bush explained away the conflict as politics as usual. "Me no have Harry Ass for Senate Menagerie Leader Reid. "

Posted on December 19, 2007

Lying, liars and damn liars

by David Holtzman

In a not-so-surprising revelation yesterday, a declassified National Intelligence Estimate (NIE) on Iran was released that concluded that Iran is not, in fact, building a nuclear weapon, and had probably stopped any such program four years ago.

Even more interesting is the fact that President Bush knew about this two months before he made a speech a couple of months ago warning that a nuclear armed Iran was a menace to the world and could start another World War.

He lied.

If he lied about this, doesn't that lend some credence to the idea that he lied about invading Iraq?

By "lied", I mean that he announced something as a fact when he had good reason to believe otherwise. Many people suggest that George Bush does this, not because he's a liar, but because he's stupid. I respectfully submit that he could be both.

There are times when a trusted leader needs to hold things back when talking to the public...for national security reasons, for instance, or to preserve the lives of military, intelligence professionals or others that are doing their jobs. But holding things back is a very different proposition than deliberately changing the facts to get the public to support what you want them to support. I realize that other Presidents have done this too (the Gulf of Tonkin, for example), but this administration must have trademarked the technique.

What America needs most of all in our next President is a sense of decency and honesty. I want someone in power that at least feels guilty when he/she lies.

Posted on December 04, 2007

Board of Congress

by David Holtzman

Waterboarding sounds like an innocent sport that you might take up in Cancun one vacation week. It is not. It is the practice of strapping a subject to a board, covering their head with a hood and slowly pouring water onto their head, into their mouth, up their nose and soon into their lungs. People who have experienced waterboarding compare it to drowning.

Malcolm Nance, a Navy terrorism specialist told Congress yesterday that it was clearly and unequivocally torture. Mr. Nance had experienced it himself as part of SERE (Survival, Evasion, Resistance and Escape) training.

He also felt that it was an ineffective interrogation technique because the questionee will say anything to make it stop. Several Republican members of Congress took exception to this and claimed that it had elicited good information from terrorist suspects already.

I am ashamed that the United States of America has gotten to the place where this kind of hairsplitting goes on. It makes a mockery of those who attacked Bill Clinton for his "it wasn't really sex" position. As a Democratic country we should be edging well away from the precipice of torture rather than lightly walking along the very brink.

I propose (and I mean this) that any Congressperson wishing to support the continued use of waterboarding volunteer to undergo 60 seconds of it under controlled conditions, such as the aviators' SERE school.

Posted on November 13, 2007

Banged in Iowa

by David Holtzman

I have long predicted that this presidential election would be typified by internet dirty tricks. It has already started, albeit with a whimper so far; the bang presumably coming in Iowa.

Wired has a couple of interesting articles this week. One analyzes the recent curious spate of emails coming from the Ron Paul campaign that apparently initiate from Korean spambots. This junk mail, replete with random string headers to circumvent spam filters, have actually accomplished their job, increasing media awareness of Paul, who did not have a ghost of a chance a few months ago.

There have also been several fake political websites springing up, purporting to be for a candidate, but actually lambasting him/her.

The interesting thing about these deceptive sites and to some extent, the email, is who is affected by this. The theory is that the dumb ol' electorate is getting swayed by these deceptions.

I'm afraid that the truth is that it is the media are the ones mostly affected by this trickery. In their ever-increasing attempt to scoop the other channels, conventional news outlets have taken to scouring the Internet for real-time stuff and they sadly do not do a lot of fact-checking. We, the electorate, do not have the time or the inclination to scour the Internet looking for a new political website and maybe we don't care so much anyway. It's the media's reporting that becomes newsworthy--they are the targets for this manipulation.

Wait until we get close to the primaries. I predict a three-ring circus with crazy websites, some satirical, some nasty, some pornographic. It's so easy to copy the pictures and other stuff from the official website and therefore easy and quick to create a fake one.

Posted on November 06, 2007

Dumb and Dumberer--FEMA strikes again

by David Holtzman

FEMA has proven that its previously disastrous track record repairing New Orleans after Katrina was no accident. They have now added Wag-the-Dog deceptiveness to their grab bag of multiple shades of incompetence. To "aid in getting information out" about the Southern California wildfires FEMA scheduled a short notice (15 minutes) emergency press conference in which Vice Admiral Harvey Johnson, FEMA's Deputy Director was interviewed by reporters. Sounds responsive?

Unfortunately the press conference was staged. All of the questions (which were softball anyway) came from FEMA staff pretending to be reporters. The genuine reporters were given an 800 number to call in and listen.

It reminds me of Orson Wells's infamous War of the Worlds broadcast.

It's nice to know that FEMA employees know enough about technology to fake a conference call, but the whole process appears to be lacking any sense of ethical grounding, reaching a new low of perfidy, even for the Bush administration, hitherto noted for taking 1st prize in the morality limbo Olympics.

The White House chastised the FEMA employees and the chief of Homeland Security, Michael Chertoff, also verbally scolded them.

I probably would have sent them to jail or at least lined up the ringleaders including the Admiral of all Vices Johnson who clearly should have known better and had them conduct a real press conference in which the idiots could publicly take the blame and apologize to the public.

Responsible confession is more soothing to the soul than faceless accusations followed by minimal or no meaningful punitive action.

Posted on October 28, 2007

Slimy patriotism

by David Holtzman

Good for Obama. Coming on the heels of some obviously disheartening polling results that he is getting the crap kicked out of him by Hillary, Barack has said one of the most honest things that I've ever seen a politician quoted as saying--he has not worn an American flag pin since 9/11 because:

"Somebody noticed I wasn't wearing a flag lapel pin and I told folks, well you know what? I haven't probably worn that pin in a very long time. I wore it right after 9/11/ But after a while, you start noticing people wearing a lapel pin, but not acting very patriotic. Not voting to provide veterans with resources that they need. Not voting to make sure that disability payments were coming out on time."

I am a big, big fan of this sentiment. Since 9/11, the leechtoads have crawled out of the woodwork in this country, croaking patriotic sentiments as they initiate and defend unpatriotic actions such as torture and espionage against our own citizens. An enameled bit of worn metal does not remove these sins any more than a deathbed confession and last rites will send a murderer or lawyer to heaven.

Posted on October 05, 2007

Bill Clinton prepares for his new role

by David Holtzman

A new Washington Post/ABC poll shows that in a hypothetical match-up, Senator Clinton would beat Giuliani in a general election by an 8 point margin. The same poll also showed that Americans view President Clinton as an asset to his wife's campaign. That's not too surprising--people like Bill Clinton. Especially now in comparison to who's been running the country for the last 7 years.

It's too early for these numbers to mean much. Lots of things haven't happened yet. There haven't be any major debates, no primaries, no real scandals or campaign flame-outs. Plus the mighty media machine hasn't really ground down any candidates for kicks yet.

But it is interesting to see Obama's campaign die off a bit and watch Senator Edwards, who has worked so hard to become President, slip back into the legal ooze that he reached out from.

For the first time today, I have seriously thought about what it means to have Hillary Rodham Clinton as President and to have Slick Willie as First Spouse. It's not a bad future, but it would certainly be different than Georgie is today.

I think that it would mean:

1. We'd stay in Iraq. Any president is stuck with that legacy now.
   
2. There'd probably be another attempt to fix the national health care system
   
3. The gossip tabloids would absolutely go nuts. The blessed silence that was the roar of Bill Clinton's sex life would manifest again. As well as the old speculations about Hillary's.
   

Posted on October 04, 2007

Craig's Senate career is not flushed yet

by David Holtzman

Senator Larry Craig will be going to the Senate this session after all. The disgraced Utahan has recanted from his previous commitment to resign by the end of September and now says that he will attend Congress until his name is cleared.

For those with retrograde amnesia, Senator Craig was caught by an undercover police officer last month soliciting sex from under a bathroom stall in a Minnesota airport. The good Senator pleaded guilty, but is now claiming that he didn't understand that "guilty" mean he did it.

He is an embarrassment for the party of embarrassments.

Posted on September 28, 2007

License to character assassinate

by David Holtzman

I have often wrote about how easy it would be to attack a political candidate more or less anonymously over the Internet. I predicted that it would be an issue in 2004 and I was wrong. I feel more comfortable about renewing that thought for 2008. Perhaps I'm just an early adopter.

It's already happening. Former Senator and character actor extraordinaire Fred Thompson has been contending with a vicious web site called PhonyFred.com that attacks Thompson for many things including calling him: Fancy Fred, Five o’Clock Fred, Flip-Flop Fred, McCain Fred, Moron Fred and Playboy Fred. "Playboy" Fred?

The site is being attributed to Romney because the creator of the site is a Vice President at the strategic firm advising Romney's run.

So these guys are pretty dumb, right? It's pretty easy to hide the trail--certainly easier than that. Obfuscate the domain name contact info, choose a generic corporate name when opening up the ISP account and better yet, host it outside the US. It works just as quickly if the server is in the Caymans as if it's in New York.

If we don't soon see lots of these trash n' flash sites, I'll be surprised. It's so easy to do, only what might still pass as integrity should stop any candidate from trying it. Hell, call me. I'll consult.

Posted on September 12, 2007

Larry Craig, not that there's anything wrong with that

by David Holtzman

Larry Craig. Most of us didn't even know who he was last month. For the record, he's a Republican Senator from Idaho who votes fairly conservatively on most issues, supporting the Patriot Act and is against gay marriages. Most recently he has been in the news because he was caught "cruising" (also called "cottaging") a men's room at the Minneapolis, St. Paul airport. According to the police officer's report:

At 1216 hours, Craig tapped his right foot. I recognized this as a signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct. Craig tapped his toes several times and moves his foot closer to my foot.... The presence of others did not seem to deter Craig as he moved his right foot so that it touched the side of my left foot which was within my stall area. Craig then proceeded to swipe his hand under the stall divider several times

Craig pled guilty. After the story broke, the Republican leadership broke with him, most calling for his resignation. The Senator announced his intention to resign by the end of the month, but is apparently now equivocating a bit.

I don't like hypocrites and the list of holier-than-thou Congressmen who say one thing in front of the camera and do another in private marches on. Not just sex of course, but as Michael Moore so famously pointed out in Fahrenheit, almost none of the biggest war mongers on the Hill have sent their own kids to Iraq.

So I bet I wouldn't like Craig for his hypocrisy, but hey, that's not what he's getting beat up about. He's being beat up for being GAY. Yeah, cruising stalls in a public place is illegal (I think it is?), but that's not why Craig is being abandoned...it's because it looks like he plays for the other ball team. Craig is being lumped into the same gravy as wannabe pedophile Mark Foley (another Republican Congressman, this one from the state of lunacy--Florida.) Craig did not betray the trust of young people, he was looking for some action. So why is what he did (being gay) occupying the same niche as child stalkers like Foley? Could it be...American homophobia?

Nah.

Posted on September 05, 2007

Speedy no more

by David Holtzman

Attorney General "Speedy" Gonzalez has resigned. Following the departure of Karl Rove, that means sayonara to two of President Bush's death commandos. Of course, that still leaves the Prince of Darkness himself, "Dick" Cheney.

Bush is beleaguered, besieged and as always bewildered. He is truly the lamest of the ducks. Without Gonzalez, Congressional scrutiny must of necessity, be transferred to the Dickmeister. It will be interesting to see who Congress goes after next. Scooter Libby took the first spear and the other Lieutenants have resigned. I expect to see the laser-like light of Congressional glares aiming at the Veep.

Posted on August 28, 2007

Cowards queue for candidacy

by David Holtzman

I was disturbed by reading a Washington Post article this morning about the military background of the major presidential candidates--there is none. Except for John McCain, not a single leading candidate for President has served in the military. The Post charitably gives George Bush credit for his frat boy flying days in the National Guard--I do not.

As a veteran, I am appalled. I don't think that military service is an absolute litmus test for political office, but come on, none of them? War mongerers like Fred Thompson and Romney have not served and as the Post also points out, none of Romney's 5 sons have deigned to be in the military either. Although Romney disengeniously suggests that their helping him run for office is equivalent.

Really.

I'll give Hillary Clinton a pass on this because there weren't many women in the military when she could have gotten involved, but the hell with the rest of them.

As the Iraqi war rages on, it becomes clearer that war is something that you send someone else's kids to. The problem here is gradual rise of the professional politician class in America where public service means being the head piglet sucking at society's teat. What happened to giving back to society?

Posted on August 24, 2007

Pimps 'n chimps

by David Holtzman

It's official--Bush's brain has resigned; allowing it to float above the quicksand into which the rest of the body politic is rapidly sinking. Karl Rove, George Bush's longterm friend, Svengali, political confidante and Rasputin has decided to throw in the extra-large K-Mart beach towel and beat a hasty retreat out of office after being told that if he did not leave by Labor Day, he would be expected to stay until the end of the President's term.

It's unfortunate that Bush will not be impeached; misery loves company and I would pay good coin of the realm to see Rove up there with the rest of the good ol' white boys who run this country clutching each other in the dock, tears drizzling down their blubbery cheeks as they testify in their best Sergeant Schultz voice, "I saw nothing, I did nothing!"

But alas it is not to be. Karl Rove will slip off quietly into that good night. The man who successfully derailed John McCain's 2000 presidential bid by spreading surreptitious slander about McCain's adopted children ("Pssst! John McCain has BLACK babies") has gotten away with it. The crafter of the hand-me-down Executive Privilege strategy keeping the soft moist little Bushies away from the dessication of a Congressional grilling will not, I'm sorry to say, ever have those self-same fires turned on him.

The mad monk of the GOP, Rove has always enjoyed a special status in the Bush White House, being as that he has had an unfair advantage because of his opposing thumbs. Rove is Bush's friend. He is Dubya's advisor. Although Condie Rice tells Georgie when to pee, it is Rove that tells George where.

For his brains and ingenuity, his scheming and strategy, Karl Rove, this Bud's for you. I hope that the next monkey in the white house has a dumber master turning the crank while he grins and grinds his organ.

Posted on August 13, 2007

A hell of her own--Pelosi has a nemesis

by David Holtzman

It seems like a long shot...Nancy Pelosi's short reign as She-Who-Must-Be-Obeyed is being challenged by peace activist Cindy Sheehan. Ms. Sheehan gave Ms. Pelosi until the end of July to begin impeachment proceedings against President Bush or Sheehan would challenge her for her seat. Ms. Pelosi has not done so.

The odds against Ms. Sheehan winning (as an independent no less) are roughly the same as of me winning the Kentucky Derby this year--as a horse. But, part of me wants to see her win. Not because I know enough about Sheehan to want her in office, but because I am sick and tired of the Democratic Congressional leaders, including most especially Nancy Pelosi.

These "career politicians" whined for years about how Bush was getting away with this or that. War in Iraq, blah, blah, Anthrax, blah, surveillance of Americans, blah, blah. Yet now that they've had a chance to do something about it, the well-dressed narcissistic little mommies' boys and girls are demurring. Too fastidious to fight and too self-serving to care, they have had their opportunity to reach up out of the fiery pit that's their personal hell and grab for the firmament of ethics that could save them, but no matter how loud that salvation knocks, they are deaf. The Democratic Congress are cowards. Their rubber stamp approval of Bush's warrantless wiretapping authorization this week damns them for what they are.

I do not demand or even expect an impeachment, but I am tired of politically motivated complaisance after six years of power tactics by Bush, Cheney, Rumsfield and Rove so naked and on display that Gypsy Rose Lee would have blushed.

Perhaps they need a wakeup call. If Cindy Sheehan were to be elected, that might be an elbow in the sleeper's ribs. I'm afraid that what they really need is to be gone, gone, gone. We need to elect real leaders and show these puffing egomaniacs the door, or at least trap them in a room full of mirrors, where they would be unable to leave, constantly preening and posturing to their own graying reflection.

Posted on August 10, 2007

Gonzalez is passed the torch of dishonesty

by David Holtzman

Alberto Gonzalez is a liar. Or so says FBI Director, Robert S. Mueller. In sworn testimony before Congress, Mueller contradicted Gonzalez's sworn avowal last week that his bizarre hospital visit to former Attorney General John Ashcroft was not about approving the probably illegal NSA warrantless wiretap program called TSP (Terrorist Surveillance Program) secretly authorized by President Bush four years ago. The Justice Department had concluded that the program was not legal and Ashcroft's acting deputy, James Comey, had supported that view. Gonzalez had apparently visited Ashcroft to get him to reverse his Deputy. Ashcroft was under sedation, but to his credit, refused to do so. Comey had threatened to resign as a protest for the continuation of the illegal surveillance program.

In addition to that lie, Gonzalez has repeatedly muddied the waters on the politics behind the firing of several US Attorneys last year.

Gonzo journalism can be compelling and thrilling. Gonzo politics is embarrassing to this country.

Attorney General Alberto "Judge" Gonzalez, has lied under oath and if he continues to resist resigning the post that he currently holds, will be doing this country a grave disservice. "Judge" Gonzalez may hold the technical qualifications for this job but he lacks the moral credentials. Like much of Bush's senior staff, Gonzalez is morally adrift, clinging to the shady notion that the President's desires trump Congress, the courts and most importantly, the American people. Several prominent newspapers and op-ed columnists have lambasted Gonzalez for his lack of integrity.

He is a disgrace to the United States.

Posted on July 27, 2007

What's slimier than a politican?

by David Holtzman

In the reptilian pecking order of less-than-ethical professions, none is so slimy as a politician. I always knew this, of course, but I get constant reaffirmation of that daily. Consider, for instance, a new bipartisan bill that passed Congress yesterday banning payment for spouses for campaign work. My first thought at reading this, was "My God, they do this?" Yes they do. A study by the watchdog group, Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington, shows that over one hundred Chairmen and ranking minority members of House Committees inappropriately used their positions to benefit their families, including direct payment for campaign work.

Come on, they pay their wives for this? Why don't constituents boot them out when they find out about it? Jaded as I thought I was, this surprised me.

When will the USA dump our professional politician class and replace them with people that have lives outside politics and who do not see an elected position the same way that little boys see magic beans or cows in fairy tales?

Posted on July 24, 2007

Video thrilled the political star

by David Holtzman

It's started. Not just the 2008 Presidential race, but the inevitable Internet involvement. And by "involvement", I don't just mean a couple of blogs, I'm talking about full-scale mass media. Take for example, the summer rave song, "Obama Girl". It features a very attractive young lady named Amber Lee Ettinger gyrating and "singing" (actually sung by Leah Kauffman) about her crush on Barack Obama while wearing tight shorty-shorts. This bit has become so popular, it's been feature on CNN and mentioned in the Economist. The website is so full of itself from the song's popularity that they sell "Obama Girl" merchandise and even have 'deleted scenes' from the YouTube video, if you can believe that.

There's a followup that was just posted today called Obama v. Giuliani,
in which Ms. Kaufman and equally attractive backup singers get into a singing match with some Rudy supporters. The video features delightful lines like: "stop your fussin, at least Obama didn't marry his cousin" and "I still want Rudy Giuli-on-me".

I highly recommend watching it.

Of course it started last election with the Jib-Jab people who had some hilarious bush-kerry stuff.

I think that you have to view the role of the Internet in this election as analogous, maybe even parallel to that of big media. Even though there is a plethora of dreck on the Internet, there is good stuff and it does rise to the top rather quickly. And the survival formula for material on the Internet is the same as that on broadcast television--being entertaining. I think that we're in for an interesting, if slightly bumpy ride in 2008 and what's left of 2007.

I wonder if web sites should be forced to give equal time to the other candidates....

Posted on July 16, 2007

Bush screws Miers

by David Holtzman

President Bush is moving closer towards a legal confrontation with Congress this week over his directive to two former aides (including former Counsel Harriet Miers) to refuse to testify on the Hill regarding internal White House deliberations over the apparently politically-motivated firings of several US attorneys. His instructions to his aides put them in a difficult position because they risk being cited for contempt and their legal shielding by citing Executive Privilege is thin and lacks adequate case law. Harriet Mier's Supreme Court nomination last year was the only abortion that President Bush has ever publicly supported. She is also ugly.

I would like to see this showdown occur, because I believe that the Bush/Cheney White House invisibility cloak is a bad one for this country. We need a check and balance on each of the branches, The White House should be monitored by Congress, just as Congress's best-laid plans and politicos are often tied up by DC escort services.

Posted on July 10, 2007

Cheney suppresses justice

by David Holtzman

by Suzanne

The White House, the Vice President and the Justice Department have until July 18th to comply with the Senate Judiciary Committee's request for information about warrantless surveillance. This is the tenth time the Committee has requested information about the National Security Agency's (NSA) illegal wiretapping from the Bush Administration. The first nine times the Committee did not use it's subpoena power. The tenth time might be the charm and in honor of it the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) created Subpoena Watch. It features a subpoena check list with the suspects, their actions (or lack thereof), and status of subpoena issuances and document delivery. They spearheaded the case against the NSA (ACLU v. NSA). Meanwhile, they have asked public utility companies in 24 states to investigate the phone companies and protect the privacy of millions of Americans.

Posted on July 02, 2007

Spooks, mooks and crooks--Nixon's CIA

by David Holtzman

This is absolutely incredible. The long-rumored allegations about CIA skul-duggery during the turbulent '60s and '70s have more or less been confirmed yesterday by the release of the hithero classified collection of Agency paperwork known as "The Family Jewels."

Most of this stuff had been revealed to Congress and generally known, if not confirmed by the public, but still...Some of the highlights include:

1. The CIA did try and get the Mafia to kill Castro, offering two underworld Dons $150,000 to feed the Cuban leader a poison pill
   
2. The CIA did test LSD and other hallucinogens on innocent and unsuspecting civilians, including at least one government scientist who subsequently killed himself.
   
3. Richard Helms, the head of CIA during the Nixon era received a letter from one of the Watergate conspirators, James McCord, an ex-CIA employee, describing the break-in. Helms suppressed the document, even though Congress was in the middle of an investigation
   

That these documents existed surprised no one. Seeing them is nothing short of confirmation for the paranoid. All of these allegations were considered to reside exclusively in the province of nuttyville and were believed by tinfoil hat-wearing conspiracy theorists who perpetually walked funny because of too many alien probes.

So I wonder, which of the many conspiracy stories that live today in Crazytown will turn out to be true 30 years from now? My bet is on Cheney and his slippery oil industry pals lubing up Iraq for some American lovin'.

Posted on June 27, 2007